Living half my waking hours in the files of the Historical Society has shaped my view of how newspaper editors and reporters have changed the writing styles that have appeared in stories in print. Today, there seems to be another shift in how, and sometimes in what, will be allowed to “go to press.” I’m not going to delve into the current squabbling that we are enduring over “free speech.” What I want to compare is the writing style of an article that appeared in a 1903 issue of the Chillicothe Bulletin to what we see today. 

When I read this, I felt myself smiling as I read the story of a Chillicothe man whose story refers to an activity that was seldom written about in newspapers then. If you read my previous article concerning Diamond Lil, Jonnie Yelm, and Joe Ehrlich, this article confirms that the presence of a “resort” (house of ill-repute) on First Street was known to exist fifteen years before Prohibition and twenty-five years before the Diamond Lil event.

Bulletin owner and editor Baily saw the humor of the situation and passed it on to his readers in the accepted writing style of the times. It is a bit lengthy, so I will try to condense it without missing the “good parts.” People of that time didn’t seem to be offended by how Baily reported on this event. 

I quote:. “Cliff Kellogg, a disreputable hanger-on at the soiled dove resort on First Street, created a little diversion Tuesday evening in a laughable attempt to end his existence in the Illinois River. The facts as near as we can learn them, are that Kellogg, who has eked out a meager existence as “bouncer” and “can crusher” for the above-mentioned immoral joint, has an undying affection for one of the inmates, Ella Smithson by name. Of late, the proprietress has objected to his constant attention to the lady mentioned and tried to impress upon his feeble intelligence that his worshipful attention was decidedly objectionable. After a fierce lover’s quarrel, Kellogg swore by all that was unholy and ungodly that if he could no longer retain his place as ‘expletive deleted,’ he would kill himself as life had lost its sweetness. 

With a curse upon his lips, he started on a dogtrot for the river, a block distant. Arriving there, he discarded his coat and vest and, to his suspenders tied a rock to weight down the worthless carcass. Taking a last despairing look at the abiding place of his lost love in hope of some signal of repentance, he plunged into the water. A number of boys who were swimming near at hand witnessed the grandstand play of Mr. Disappointed Lover and notified the marshal. But it appears that Kellogg was not seriously inclined to die, as he detached the rock and swam to a support while awaiting developments. They were not long in coming. With the marshals came a large crowd who wanted to see the fun and assist in the rescue. Kellogg was thoroughly rolled on an overturned skiff to relieve him of the water he had swallowed, after which he was taken kicking and biting, and scratching to the police station and locked up in a cell. 

At the eleventh hour, his sweetheart appeared upon the scene protesting against the unkindly treatment her lover had received and declaring that he could whip any five policemen in the state of Illinois. She was locked in cell No.2. Wednesday before the police magistrate, they both pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct and both were fined $5 costs each and ordered to leave town, which they agreed to before tomorrow night, and Chillicothe has probably seen the last of these two members of the ill-favored tribe….” 

Do you think that this event would be reported in today’s news, or include the adjectives used to describe what went on in this event?